On my way to being Wonder Woman

Last week, I needed to talk to someone...someone that I could say what I really felt, without being judged. I made an appointment to talk with my Doctor. (thanks to reading a little inspiration)

I sat in the waiting room, nervously surfing on my iPhone. I couldn't help but ease drop on a Mom, about my age, chatting it up with the nurses and doctors in the waiting room. She had a double stroller - and was holding one of the babies in her arms. The twin babies were born at 24 weeks (April 4th) at 1.5lbs each. The baby in the stroller was on oxygen. They spent 128 days in the NICU and were finally released after reaching a healthy weight. She sat there talking with the nurses, holding one baby in her left arm, while successfully making a bottle (with powdered formula) in the other...rocking the double stroller with her foot. She actually used her chin to switch the burp cloth from one shoulder to the other. This chic was like Wonder Woman. She went on to say that she only had a few days left and she had to go to work...while her babies went to daycare.

{gasp}

AND THEN THERE IS ME...waiting to talk to someone about the stresses of my job and finding a balance of being a SAHM and a WAHM. (stay at home mom and work at home mom). There I sat...so stressed out, yet my baby wasn't on oxygen, my baby was happy and healthy and slept through the night. I had it "easy". I didn't have to deal with sickness, the NICU, daycare or the fear of leaving my baby. I was there because I was going a little loopy and couldn't seem to get my shit together. I thought - What a bitch I am. What an awful mother I am.

"So why are you here? What's going on?" the Doctor asked.

"Well, the other day, my baby was crying uncontrollably. I couldn't figure out why. I put him down and I went into the bathroom, closed the door and yelled SHUT THE F*CK UP...then quickly put my hands over my mouth...hoping he didn't hear me" I replied.

Yup. I thought I was the worst. mother. in. the. world. But I had to let it out. I had to scream something. I was simply at my wits ends. Dealing with the built up frustration of working and being a SAHM.

Well after an hour conversation with my Dr. I realized that I wasn't that loopy and I was a good Mom and I can't compare my situation to anyone else. And she was right. I can't. But I do. She also reassured me that IV didn't hear me. Good. thing. Ha! My Dr. told me that if I had told them I wasn't taking a real maternity leave, they wouldn't have let me. I wish I did. I started working the day I got home from the hospital. I never had time to adjust and find balance. I'm on my way though. I'm on my way to finding my "pre-mommy, multi-tasking like rock star - Allie" I once was. I owe it to myself and my boy. I'm going to get through this...and I'm going to continue to strive to be my own WONDER WOMAN. So there!

"Fall"ing in love...

I LOVE Fall in New England and I LOVE decorating the house for the different seasons. I was good and waited until after Labor Day to decorate.

Fireplace mantel is decorated.

Bring on the football, pumpkin spice coffee and foliage! Happy Fall!



Labor Day Weekend - photo dump

Stew and I didn't go anywhere other than to Boston for the Sox game on Sunday. We enjoyed the long weekend making baby food, picking up stuff at Babies R Us and going grocery shopping. We did spend all day in Boston on Sunday though. My parents were good enough {as always} to watch IV all day.

Here are the pictures from our day...

and a few Instagram pictures from my phone...

and a picture from Babies R Us...

I hope you all had a great weekend. I'm off to finish my Ribbon Wreath thanks to AP over at I love you more than carrots!



{Sneak Peek}

A sneak peek at our Labor Day Weekend...more to come.



Somebody call 9-1-1...

...shawty fire burnin' on the dance floor (ok - my older gen won't understand that - sorry)
Someone needs to call the PoPo! Someone stole my 4 month old baby and replaced him with this toddler old man BIG BOY!

"Ya might be a Redneck if..."

"Yaknow - just hanging out with muh Mama"

{love those feet}

{his new thing}

"I will stare you down Monkey!"

So if anyone sees my little baby...let me know! 

Old Home Day, Irene & 4 Months

A lot of FIRSTS going on in the G household. We took IV to his first Old Home Day, he survived his first Hurricane and had cereal today for the first time!

Old Home Day was somewhat of a success. IV seemed to enjoy all the people and the parade - EXCEPT for the Huge truck that laid on the horn for what felt like 30 minutes. I'm sure it was like 10 seconds, but when your little one is screaming because it's so loud - it feels like FOREVER.

Yesterday, we hunkered down and waited for Hurricane Irene to make landfall. A lot of wind and rain, but very tropical. It was actually HOT out. We never lost power, although I think Stew wanted to just so he could use the generator!

And today - IV had his 4 month check up today. He did amazing - again.

Weight: 15lbs 9 oz

Height: 26.5 inches

IV and Dada waiting for Dr. Gus

All in all - A few shots, two snoopy bandaids again and we can start introducing foods!  I went to the store after his appointment and picked up some rice cereal. We just successfully had our first taste! He loved it. The minute he saw the spoon he opened his mouth.



Ok - my sleepy post-shots boy is napping, so I'm off to enjoy the sun.

My love



Happy 4 Months

Happy Four Months, My sweet boy!

So cliche of your Mama to say this - but I can't believe how fast the time is going by. How can you possibly be 4 months old?! That makes my eyes fill - yes, with tears - but it makes my heart fill with joy. I just need to brace myself for the next 4 months because now I can see how fast you are growing.

The past 4 months have been like nothing I've (we've) ever experienced. You have done it all, my Bubba. You have slept through the night, and gotten up every two hours. You have spit up, thrown up and drooled so much I thought you threw up. You have peed on me, on yourself,  on the dog, and on your Dad. But we love every minute of it. Ok wait...except that one time you spit up on my new JCrew shirt! But hey, what was I thinking wearing a new shirt?!?!? Right?

You are so strong. You love to stand every chance you get. I even got you to try walking at 15 weeks.

You are a big boy. I'm guessing about 16 lbs (based on getting on and off the scale with me). You are well into 3-6 month clothes, 6 month pajamas and even a few 9 month shirts that run small. I'm hoping the weather gets cooler around here so we can wear some of your Fall clothes before you outgrow them.

Two things you do well - sleep and eat. You have a bath every night at 7:15. Dada reads you a book before bed, while I feed you. You are sleeping by the time we make it down the stairs and turn on the monitor. Some nights you sleep until 7:00am. You sometimes get up for a snack at 4:00 though, but that's ok. You eat for about 15 minutes and are right back to bed. You still eat about 5oz every 3 hours. I put you down for a nap every 2 hours. You need your naps and love them, as long as you don't fight them. The rest of the day we go for walks, play in your jumper, with toys or do stuff around the house. I look forward to the Fall when we can put a crock pot full of chili on and do crafts together. And I can't wait for winter when you and I stay in comfy clothes all day because we are snowed in. We can put the fire on and watch Back to the Future (that movie is always on). Ahhh, I'm sure Dada is reading this right now and smiling.

You love to laugh, play peek-a-boo, have playdates and go shopping! I think you just love spending time with me. Your Dada says that you have a crush on me! That's just fine with me though, I hope I'm your first LOVE! The way you look at me when I walk in the room melts my heart. EVERY single morning, when I go into your room, you finally notice me standing over your crib and you give me a huge, gummy smile! THANK YOU! Thank you for starting my day like that. I can't believe I've lived this life without that HUGE smile every morning.

You love your Doggy, Nate and he loves you. He's very protective. As you know...he drools a lot. And even when he shakes, his spit goes flying across the room - landing somewhere on you. You don't care. When you are fast asleep and he lets out a loud bark - you don't care. Nothing scares you or startles you. You are just wondering what the heck he is. You'll know soon enough, he'll be your best friend {other than Mama and Dada.} Nate comes up to your room every time we do. He loves to sleep in front of your crib, or on the stairs...but he's always on guard. We have not neglected Nate...or your goldfish, Monte. We are taking good care of them for you. Once you get older, you'll have to take good care of them too.

Mama and Dada are quite proud of ourselves after these 4 months. We know your different cries, moods and needs. We both have never been around a baby before, let alone one that actually belongs to us! Indubitably, we've screwed up a few times...like when we couldn't figure out why you kept peeing through your diaper. Well, your genius father said "Maybe the N is too small for him?" Yeah...you were wearing a Newborn diaper and needed a bigger size. But hey - we figured it out and you survived. I hope you were secretly laughing at us too. I think that's what we all need to do more of. You laugh so much and on those days when I'm ready to break, that's really all I need to hear...your laughter. No one ever said this was going to be easy - but I think we lucked out...you are pretty easy. It's Mama who gets stressed over things sometimes.

We are planning so many things now that you are getting older. You are getting cereal after your 4 month check up with Dr Gus! I can't wait for you to have something other than milk. I bet you'll love it. Mama is searching for a Halloween costume for you, planning your Baptism and "pinning" ideas for your 1st birthday party! I know. I'm crazy - but only the best for you, kid!

We are so happy to have you as our son. Life feels so much more real, so much more complete. When I look at you, it makes me realize what is important in life. So, thank you. You have made us realize it's no longer about us. It's no longer what I'll wear, but what you will wear {ok - let's be real, I'll just find you the perfect outfit and I'll match it. When we shop...it's two for you, one for me. Eye muffs, Daddy}.

Your personality is like no other. You are such a little man now. You smile, laugh, cry, and every time you do I can't help but smile, laugh and cry along with you. You have touched so many people in your short 4 months of life. You are so loved as I knew you'd be. We are all extremely lucky to have YOU in our life. I hope you feel our love each and every day.

Your smile is so big. Your love is contagious. Your laugh is hilarious - it sounds just like mine. Your burps are manly, strangely manly.. Your feet are chunky, picture Fred Flintstone. Your hair is amazing - you have a mullet! And when you wake up, your bedhead is unlike anything I've ever seen! I call you "Kramer" all the time! Your eyes will win over the girls, but your heart will get you your wife (if Mama ever let's you get married). Keep that big ole heart of yours filled with love, Little Man. And keep being you, because you are the greatest!

I love our morning walks and our weekly grocery store shopping. All the cashiers just love you too, {They call you "The Boss"} Someone recently asked me what I did during my pregnancy to end up with a baby like you? "Did you do anything special during your pregnancy to make him so cool? so chill?" I said "Yeah. I drank. Heavily" (I kid. I kid). I love our afternoon walk to the mailbox and sitting in the garage at 5pm to wait for your Dad to get home from work. I love it when you help me (watch me) make a salad for dinner. I love giving you a bath at night. I love your naked butt! I love how your eyes light up when you see your JaJu.  You make me so proud and I can only dream of the number of times I will say that in your life. You rock, little buddy. You rock. I love you with all my heart. Thank you for making me a better person and a Mom! We love you. Happy 4 months!

Wearing his newborn hat at 4 months...

4 months photo shoot...



Now I'm off to celebrate the last 4 months with my Little Man!